I was baptized as an infant and raised in a Catholic family. I received all the necessary Catholic sacraments, went to church almost every Sunday, but I never really thought much about God. I believed in Him, but I had no desire to know Him.
When I was 16, my friend was killed in a car accident. I was furious at God, I knew He could have prevented it, so why He didn't baffled me. I thought God was the God of love, and this certainly was not loving to me. Instead of running to Him for comfort, I ran away from Him and stopped attending church all together.
When I was 18, I met Michael, who is now my husband. He told me that he loved God and loved going to church! Almost everything we talked about had something to do with God! So when I told him I was Catholic, I figured he'd be pleased that I was a Christian. But he wasn't, to my surprise! And he told me the only way we could stay together would be if the bible was my only authority for Truth. He also said we couldn't get married if I remained Catholic.
This, of course, was a huge blow to my pride. I thought I was right and I desperately tried to prove him wrong. I picked up my bible and actually started reading it for the first time. And instead of convincing Michael that I was right, I was convinced that I was wrong. The bible started making sense suddenly. While I use to think I was a pretty good person, I read in Isaiah that, "all my righteous deeds were like filthy garments" in the sight of God! Suddenly my sins seemed very serious and it finally hit me how wretched and dirty I really was.
I am not completely sure when I was saved. I do know, however, that by no work of my own, I have been saved by His grace. My desires have changed from enjoying my sin, to hating my sin! From being angry when things didn't go my way, to actually praying for brokenness and humility. Suddenly I love reading God's Word and love being in fellowship with my brothers and sisters in Christ. And now, I understand what Paul meant when he said in Romans 8:28 that, "all things work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose" I now know that suffering can be a blessing. It's through the most trying of times that my face is fixed on the cross.