Dec 18, 2007

Psalm 34:17-18

"The righteous cry, and the LORD hears
And delivers them out of all their troubles.
The LORD is near to the brokenhearted
And saves those who are crushed in spirit.

My friend quoted this verse to me when I found out our insurance company does not cover InVitro Fertilization.

I guess it wasn't in the LORD's plans. At least, not now. I am feeling much more at peace about it thankfully, but I definitely went through a mourning period. Not a godly mourning, more of a selfish kind. But I am thankful today because Christ has softened my heart towards His will. And knowing that my life is under His great sovereignty and control is wonderful. How can I ask for more?


Nate said...

Hey Samanatha,
I don't know if you remember me at all. I stopped by quite a bit about a year ago. God took my burden for you away from me, and I haven't been here in a long time. Mainly because the burden is gone, and also your page take sooooo long to load.

But, in seeing your pregnancy issues, I wanted to give you some of the experiences of my wife and I in this. My wife is on dialysis, and it is numerically impossible for her to carry to term. She did it once, by God's will, but never again. Eight and a half years we tried again. Nothing. Finally, we started looking into adoption. That is a process in itself. But, we were able to adopt a child whose mother was a over the top party girl. She would have sex with anyone for free drugs. This is how our Samuel Christian came to be conceived.

We had many concerns about adoption. Would I be able to love a baby that is not my own flesh and blood? Would the parental instinct still be there even without the pregnancy? Many other questions besides. The answer is, the beauty of the baby, eliminates all of the fears and questions. To place an unbelievable bond upon your heart and soul. Holding Samuel for the first time, my heart fused with his, and we became one blood. Many people say that they know where my son got his behaviors. "He is your son all right." I hear that often. But it is wonderful, and more rewarding than you could imagine.

The only thing that can make the adoption process take longer, is to be choosey. If you are willing to take a healthy baby, it does not take long. But if you want, blue eyed, blond hair, einstein parents, etc.. etc.. You will be waiting forever. Samuel is half white, and half black. Waited four months for a child.

Also they have risk questions they ask, if you use an agency. High to no risk. High meaning, they find an abandoned baby, and place it with you. This would mean no parental rights were severed by the courts, and if two years later, the real parents find the child they have diligently been searching for, the courts will give the child back to the original parents. No risk, meaning, both parents consented to rights being severed, the rights have been severed by the courts, and the baby is a ward of the state to award to adoptive parents. The birth parents can never come back to take the child legally.

Hope this helps. I ran across a piper video I actually liked, and thought of you.
Love in Christ,

Samantha said...

Thanks for the encouragement.